The Romantics

This movie is very high in my list. I find it really profound and truly believe that it uncovers some universal truths about love and relationships. So, thumbs up!!!

(In Laura's car)
Tripler: Oh my God! I had to get out of there. Desperate situation. Alright. Truth. Have I gotten obese? Tell me the truth.

Laura: Are we gonna start that already?

Tripler: Just tell me the truth. You can’t lie for shit.

Laura: You look revolting, head to toe.

Tripler: Good cause you’ve never looked worse in your life. (They both smile) Oh babe! (They hug)

Laura: Trip. You always know what to say.

Tripler: I think this occasion calls for a drink.

Laura: Yeah, yeah. A couple.

(Laura alone in her room practicing her speech)

Laura: Lila Hayes is not my friend. Lila Hayes is my sister. Lila and I have shared many things: Rooms, clothes, study notes, boyfriends... Lila Hayes is the luckiest girl in the world. She has beauty, intelligence, a killer backhand,m boobs I would kill for. She is graced with all these things. And she's brought us all here tonight to celebrate her greatest accomplishment... love.

(In the park rehearsing for the wedding)

Augusta: Husbands will go with wives, fiancées with fiancées. And Laura, you'll go with Chip.

(Lila and her mother talking at the rehearsal dinner while they watch the groom at the beach staring at the ocean)

Augusta: That's funny, isn't it?

Lila: What's funny?

Augusta: I don't know, just the way he's standing there like that.

Lila: What's funny about it?

Augusta: Ok, well maybe funny is the wrong word, but... strange. It's a little strange. Don't you think?

Lila: What about it is strange?

Augusta: The way he's staring out to sea like a lovesick sailor.

Lila: He's a groom. Grooms get nervous.

Augusta: Of course.

Lila: Mother please don't.

Augusta: You know what I think.

Lila: Yes, I know what you think.

Augusta: And... perhaps you'll permit me to say it.

Lila: I know you will, regardless.

Augusta: He has to love you more, Lila.

Lila: More than what? More than whom?

Augusta: More than you love him. That's the only way marriage works.

Lila: Leave him alone!

(At the rehearsal dinner)

Laura: Lila is graced with beauty and intelligence and determination. Lila and I were roommates in college.I was from the Midwest, she was from the East Coast. My first memory is, we were both on Old Campus in line for our college IDs and freshmen. And all of a sudden this stranger comes up to me and says: "You know we're gonna have these IDs for the rest of the year, right?" And, I said, "Yes". And then she goes: "Well, didn't you bring your make up?" So when she painted me up with Lancome's best, I knew we were gonna be good friends. And, yet, it was touch and go at first, but we realized that our differences made us stronger, you know? We got the nickname 'La-La' because we loved each other. And we loved our friends. Our friends got the nickname 'The Romantics'. Because of our incestuous dating history. Umm... We... we were just in love with each other. Because that's what friends do. They fall in love with each other. And they fall out of love and they fall back in love and this happens over and over again for the rest of their lives. The fact that Tom and Laura... (she gets really nervous) The fact that Tom and Lila found each other is exceptional, because they are both exceptional people. And I wish them all of the joy in the world. To their glittering future!

Tom: I liked your speech.

Laura: Thank you.

Tom: I did. It was good. You were nervous but it was good.

Laura: Congratulations!

Tom: Thank you. Look I'm sorry.

Laura: It's OK. It was necessary.

Tom: Yeah, it was for the best.

Laura: You know what? It was easier than I thought it was gonna be.

Tom: Really? Really, cause I thought it was harder than I... it was harder than I thought it was gonna be. (...) So you miss me?

Laura: Not for a second.

Minnow: Are you nervous?

Lila: I'm terrified.

Minnow: You are?

Lila: Yep. To the bone.

Minnow: About what?

Lila: I'm not sure Tom can... I'm not sure Tom... I'm not sure Tom is...

Minnow: Not sure Tom is what?

Lila: I'm... I'm just not sure.

Minnow: Does he make you feel beautiful?

Lila: Yes.

Minnow: Does he make you feel safe?

Lila: Most of the time.

Minnow: Does he make you feel special?

Lila: Don't be a dork.

Minnow: You know, like you're his most interesting person.

Lila: Yes, yes. He does. You know what? This is dumb. Let's just forget it.

Laura: Why are you here?

Tom: I don’t know. Just thought that I would swim halfway across the bay at the chance to be alone with you.

Laura: You’re so full of it.

Tom: I’m totally serious.

Tom: I owe you an apology.

Laura: Ok... let’s not talk about it.

Tom: So you… you forgive me?

Laura: I wouldn’t push your luck. You know a heads up would’ve been nice. You know nothing… nothing major, just… just a quick email. You know, “Hey Laura. I know I saw you last night and countless others over the last ten years, and not excluding the four years we dated in college and the year we got back together to try again and the handful of times that we’ve slept together since but you know that Lila and I are together now. And though I’ve struggled endlessly with this predicament, I think we both know the inevitable here, so don’t be surprised when she calls you and asks you to be her maid of honor”. Or you know what? This is another approach. Less direct, but same effect. “Hey Laura, great seeing you last night. Great movie, great meal, great sex, but the problem is greatness makes me sick. I’ll see you at the wedding”. You know on the other hand, I mean. Look ten years of a loving friendship and sporadic, incredible sex, scattered with nights so fun, they explain the evolutionary purpose of talking. You know not to mention the times that we’ve clocked together. Listening to music. You know, driving with no destination. I guess this, this beautiful mess is best ended without notification. Probably better.

Tom: I’m sorry.

Laura: Don’t be. It was a gift. An act of cowardice so complete, disqualifies a person from consideration.

Tom: I tried to do what I thought was right, ok? It’s not like I came at this lightly.

Laura: Oh, no.

Tom: Laura, you’re the one that broke up with me.

Laura: Fuck you.

Tom: I was a lifeguard in highschool, you remember that?

Laura: Yeah, I remember.

Tom: It was my favorite summer job.

Laura: You and every other guy in America.

Tom: I would sit in that chair itching, itching to get out, dying to get into the water. And after eight hours my shift would end and I would make a break for it. But as soon as I got into the water, the strangest thing happened. I would start to panic.

Laura: Ambivalence is a disease, you know. An actual mental illness.

Tom: That’s not funny.

Laura: Let me guess, when you were a kid you would order chocolate ice cream, then immediately wish you’d gotten vanilla?

Tom: That’s not what I’m talking about.

Laura: No, I get it. You’re torn between two women.

Tom:  What I’m trying to say is… I’m afraid of the ocean.

Laura: I’ll remember that the next time I swim on your clock.

Tom: You think you have kind of a special gift for knowing what is in my heart, Laura?

Laura: No, no, I think we both do for each other.

Tom: Has it ever occurred to you that I might need a woman like Lila?

Laura: And what kind of woman is that?

Tom: I don’t know, somebody happy.

Laura: Meaning numb?

Tom: Somebody practical.

Laura: Meaning busy?

Tom: Somebody confident.

Laura: Meaning rich?

Tom: Somebody stable.

Laura: Meaning frigid?

Tom: Someone who doesn’t tear other people down to build herself back up.

Laura: In other words your polar opposite.

Tom: Yeah, yeah maybe.

Laura: Well, haven’t you heard? Opposites attract and then they bore each other to death.

Tom: You know, boring is better than maddening.

Laura: I’d rather die of excitement.

(She walks away from him)

Tom: Hey, hey, hey. (Goes after her).

Laura: (Turning around) Do you remember that paper, junior year?

Tom: Yeah, of course. ‘The Hopeless Romantics: Misconceptions of a Movement’.

Laura: Yeah. Only you could start a 50 page paper the night before.

Tom: And still get an A-minus.

Laura: Because I wrote it.

Tom: You maybe wrote half of it.

Laura: Ode to a Nightingale: A love song to inspiration.

Tom: The Romantics weren’t writing about love, they were writing about religion.

Laura: Then I’m not sure I know the difference. “Forlorn. The very word is like a bell tolling me back from thee to my sole self”. What’s the next line?

Tom: I can’t remember.

Laura: Liar.

Tom: Anybody can make a big romantic gesture, all right? The question is: What happens after? Do you remember? Do you remember what you said to me that night?

Laura: Yeah, I remember everything.

Tom: So, what’d you say?

Laura: I said it was the perfect night.

Tom: You said it was the perfect night.

Laura: So?

Tom: So? How do I top that?

Laura: We had so much fun.

Tom: We had so much fun.

Laura: So what’s the problem with that?

Tom: The problem is, every time we had one of these amazing nights, I would wake up the next morning in a freaking panic. So why don’t we just spare each other a mundane life of crushing disappointment, and just do it with somebody else.

Laura: That is the weakest excuse I have ever heard. Just say you are in love with Lila.

Tom: Say what? Want me to say that I want to marry you? That I’m gonna spend the next 50 years regretting this very moment?

Laura: You inspired me.

Tom: You inspired me too.

Laura: Then we were supposed to be together.

Tom: I know.

Laura: I’m gonna go and I’m gonna tell everyone that you’re ok.

Tom: But I’m not. I’m not ok.

Laura: You chose this. (She walks away)

(Tom goes to Lila's room late at night after his talk with Laura)

Lila: What are you doing here?

Tom: We need to talk.

Lila: Honey, I’m superstitious.

Tom: Please, just let me in.

Lila: What’s the matter? Did something happen? You’re having a pre-wedding panic attack?

Tom: Don’t patronize me, ok? Lila I love you.

Lila: I love you too.

Tom: Yeah, but why?

Lila: Cause you’re smart. And charming, and handsome. And you make me feel safe and happy. And, when I’m with you, even the most tedious things are fun and exciting. And you’re a very good kisser.

Tom: Thank you.

Lila: It’s true. Why do you love me?

Tom: That’s the thing. I don’t know.

Lila: I’m sorry. What?

Tom: I’m so confused right now, I…

Lila: You’re not doing this now.

Tom: Why not now? Isn’t now better than later?

Lila: Ok. I’ll tell you why you love me. Because you need me.

Tom: We’re so different.

Lila: Yes, we are. And when you’re not behaving like a total freak, it’s what makes us work.

Tom: Ok, you’re patronizing me again.

Lila: No, I’m not.

Tom: Why is emotion some kind of a mental illness with you?

Lila: It is if you indulge in it all the time. Don’t you think I wanna freak out? Don’t you think I wanna lose my shit? Why do you get to be the one that drinks too much, that says scandalous things, that has wild mood swings? Has it ever occurred to you that those are freedoms afforded to you by me? Has it ever occurred to you that my emotions are just as intense? I just work harder to control them.

Tom: But why? You don’t have to. I wish that you would lose it more.

Lila: Who? Who should I lose it to? My mom? My brother? You? Take a look around Tom. Somebody’s gotta keep their cool. (She screams out loud, insanely and then takes a deep breath) I just… I need you to hold it together for another 12 hours. Can you do that for me?

Tom: Yeah, I think so.

Lila: Ok. Now go find Pete and Jake and have a good talk before you cause us any more bad luck.

Tom: Ok.

(The bridesmaids are helping Lila get ready for the wedding and Laura enters the room with the bouquets and hands Lila the flowers)

Lila: There you are. Thank goodness. I was starting to think you’d run off with those. Minnow?

Laura: I’m sorry.

Lila: It’s fine. You were just in time.

Laura: No, not about the flowers. I saw Tom last night.

Lila: That’s nice. Did you get a chance to catch up?

Laura: I found him when he was missing.

Lila: Guess those years as a Girl Scout paid off.

Laura: No, he wasn’t lost. He was hiding.

Lila: I know all about his meltdown.

Laura: That’s not what I mean.

(Augusta enters the room)

Augusta: Honey you look so beautiful. Girls, it’s time to process. Let’s go.

Lila: (Ignoring her mother and looking at Laura) What do you mean? (Minnow takes her mother out of the room)

Laura: I mean he wasn’t alone last night. He was with me. We were together.

Lila: Why are you telling me this right now? This doesn’t concern me.

Laura: It doesn’t?

Lila: Laura…

Weesie: Trip why don’t we go… (They keep talking as they leave the room, as they perceive how tense the situation is)

Lila: He’s a groom. I’d be concerned if he wasn’t a wreck the night before his wedding.

Laura: If he was in love with someone else, would that concern you?

Lila: Laura, this chapter is over.

Laura: Li, I love him.

Lila: Yes, and I feel sorry for you.

Laura: You know I have tried to change these feelings. I’ve done everything. Other guys, other towns, other jobs. And they say that it gets easier with time, but it doesn’t. If anything, if more time passes, the more I miss him.

Lila: Unrequited love is the perfect romantic construct. It allows two cowardly people to act out a fantasy of love without having to face any real consequences.

Laura: Li, you know he feels the same way. He always has and you know that.

Lila: You are my maid of honor!

Laura: Yeah. And I have done anything I possibly can to fulfill that obligation. I thought that I could get through this. I did. But I can’t, and he can’t either. He doesn’t want this either.

Lila: You remember sophomore year? The Lit Christmas party when you wore my dress? The red one I bought especially for the event? You took that too, without asking. And then when I went to get ready for the event my dress was missing.

Laura: Oh you know what? I picked that dress out. When we were on Chapel Street, we saw it in the window of Nelly’s and you remember I picked it out and then you went back and you bought it. I was the editor of Lit. It was my night, it was my occasion.

Lila: Or the time I got the apple tattoo and then a week later you got the same one?

Laura: You saw me draw that in 19^th century novel, ok? And then, all of a sudden you show up and you have it branded on your tailbone.

Lila: Freshman, sophomore, every year of college, when I provided you months of meticulous notes hours before the finals, you feel entitled to my things because you want them!

Laura: Mine! Mine!! Yeah, fine. You win Lila. You provided my with the meticulous study notes. But you know what? I inspired your best ideas. And when you got together with Tom, senior spring, I was still dating him.

Lila: (Really exasperated) Why are you doing this to me right now!!?

Laura: Because you’re about to marry a man and I don’t think you should.

Lila: You just can’t bear to see me happy and so you have to trash it with your emotions.

Laura: No, Li. You deserve to be with someone who’s in love with you, totally and completely.

Lila: How dare you try to pass this off as an act of friendship? This is sabotage.

Laura: No, this takes courage.

Lila: Courage? That’s funny.

Laura: I am not trying to hurt you.

Lila: Yes, you are. That is your intention. This has nothing to do with Tom. It’s about me and you and your envy!

Laura: (She kind of laughs showing that she can’t believe what she’s just heard) No. You can’t do this.. You can’t. You can’t bully me anymore. Obviously, I am torn. And as your friend, I do want what is best for you. But I can’t keep putting you ahead of me forever.

Lila: My God, you’re delusional. You actually believe you are entitled to my fiance. This is not a difficult or complicated situation, Laura. This is very simple. I won and you’re jealous.

Laura: Jealous? No. I pity you. Your groom is in love with another woman.

Lila: He asked me to marry him. Not you. All this is, certainly tragic. Debatably interesting, but it really doesn’t matter anymore, because he’s marrying me in ten minutes.

Laura: Li, he cheated on you.

Lila: No. You did. (She briskly lifts her dress) Oh my God! Can I move yet?? (She leaves the room)

(At the wedding)
Tom: Lila... Lila... When I look... Lila, when I look at you I'm speechless. I literally have nothing to say... You know I... If I..
Tripler: (Whispering) Did you feel that?
Weesie: No, I didn't.
Tom: Lila, words fail the depth and complexity of my feelings for you. I need canons of literature, unwritten books, an entirely new language. But the thing is, without words, I have nothing. I have nothing. You know I.. If I...
Lila: Maybe I should say it for you.
(It starts raining and everybody runs to the house, except from Tom and Laura who stand there, look at each other and start laughing)

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